Food Allergy and Anaphylaxis Information - Blog

We had a “successful” Fun Day at preschool on Sunday. We are learning to re-define some key terms in our life. Successful would once have meant picking the best prize in the lucky dip, or winning first prize in the raffle. Successful on this occasion means NO ALLERGIC REACTIONS.

Last year, I didn’t feel comfortable taking the kids to an Easter Fun Day, where there was a sausage sizzle and an Easter Egg hunt. I went, to witness how it all worked, and to show my support as I am on the committee. I saw how they organised the food and activities. Invaluable information.

Armed with this knowledge, this year, I worked with the Fun Day coordinator, to make all the kids food, drinks and ice blocks safe. Our kids know that we do not eat sausages from a sausage sizzle, so Declan didn’t even ask if he could have one. Bianca, well, she was a little unimpressed. Even though we knew the sausages were safe, we didn’t want to confuse them with it being “ok to eat them sometimes, and not at other times”. Consistency is a good thing. The kids know that they can have bread from a packet where we can check the ingredients, just like the margarine and sauce. So this is what they nibbled on. This was followed by ice blocks, where they saw us check the ingredients on the box.

A magic show followed the food. All the kids were enthralled. Cakes were put on a table outside for the adults to eat. Of course this made us uneasy, but they were for the adults. Declan was summoned onto the stage to be involved in a few tricks and ended up holding a bunny for all the kids to come over and pat. As they lined up outside, they saw the table with the cakes. After their pat, some kids grabbed cake and took it inside to eat. BAD for us! To get the cake outside, the magic show was stopped and the kids were then instructed to go outside and find the Easter Eggs. But as the magic show hadn’t finished yet, they brought them inside to eat. VERY BAD for us!

The egg hunt had been planned for after the magic show. We had arranged to leave when the other kids were busy egg hunting. But as the plans changed to go with the flow, we were left to decide if we would stay or go. I wanted to leave then and there, but my husband did not want our kids to miss the rest of the show. So he stood up the back with Declan, and I waited with Bianca at my parents home, just up the road. She was getting a bad cold and I felt very uncomfortable being there.

My husband is not as anxious or reactive at me. He felt very proud that he stayed and was able to make the most out of an awkward situation. I realise that Declan needs more of these instances to be able to handle such situations when he faces them in the future. Seeing all those kids walking around with chocolate on their hands and butter icing on their face, gave us a glimpse into what it will be like at lunch times at school next year. OH DEAR!!

The Fun Day coordinator was devastated that the thoroughly planned procedures for the day fell by the wayside. After many apologies, I finally convinced her that kids are completely unpredictable, and as much as we try to control situations, for the most part, it is impossible. It really is up to us to have educated our own children to look out for their own safety, to have a great sense of self-awareness, and an excellent ability to assess each and every situation for the risks. We can’t rely on everyone else to make every social situation ’safe’ for us.
We are constantly reminded every day that other people are not going to take responsibility for our kids’ life-threatening allergies. It isn’t their responsibility.

I am tempted to bake all the cakes for the next function, just like I did last year. It would make the environment safer, and give more food options for our kids to eat. But, what would we be teaching our kids? They would never get any practice in risk assessment, nor any confidence in their own ability to look after themselves. I struggle with this decision all the time. Our first instinct is always to protect our kids. But their is also another vital role we play as their parents - educator. We can’t be looking over their shoulder for the next 15 years. It would make my life easier if I could, but it just isn’t possible. They are growing up, and we need to let them grow up.

So our new definition of a successful event, is “reaction-free”. The kids might fight the whole car trip, we might lose a hat, I might even lose my purse, but with no reactions….. it is still a very successful event.

I love kids parties. We have them at every opportunity - Easter, Halloween, Christmas and birthdays. I love organising them and watching them come to fruition. I love watching my kids get fully involved at the parties without having to think about ‘who has eaten and what’, and ‘are their hands clean?’. I love concocting themed food for each event, and games to match…it is almost a passion of mine. I love that the food and drinks are dairy-free, nut-free and egg-free.

So for Easter this year, the preparations have begun. We will be keeping the guest list to two other families, bringing the total number of kiddies up to 7.

**Decorations**
The kids love to do craft, so I have cut out a lot of egg shapes from white cardboard that they will paint and glitter them as they like. These will be hung up around the front yard (weather permitting an outside party). The rest of the decorations will include streamers tied up to blow in the breeze (white, pastel pink, yellow and blue). Some will have little cardboard eggs taped on to give a more festive feel.

**Games**
-Pin the cotton ball tail on the Easter Bunny
-Egg and spoon race: with big plastic spoons and plastic eggs that when dropped split into two and a beanbag egg white and yolk fall out
-Easter egg waddle: put confetti into a white balloon and blow it up halfway, enough to make a good egg shape. Add some dots or colourful stickers to make it look like an easter egg. The kids have a race to see who can walk from A to B with the ‘egg’ between their knees without dropping it. They then pop it. The first one to do this wins. (Watch the confetti and broken balloon pieces with little children)
-The Bunny Hop: This is like musical statues, but the children have to hop around like bunnies and freeze when the music stops. I will get some bunny ears for them which they can take home.
Egg toss: I made some beanbag easter eggs (or simply use painted foam eggs), and the kids all have a turn at throwing the eggs into the Easters Bunnies basket. This is harder if the basket has a handle on it.
-Easter egg hunt: I had always wanted to have Easter Egg hunts with my kids, I never anticipated that they wouldn’t be able to pick them up when they found them. Then with the discovery of dairy-free eggs, I thought that would be the answer. Then with the contaminated egg issue (see previous entries) this also was not an option! So each year we have a tradition that is much more fun, creative and healthier. The kids and I paint and decorate various sized foam eggs and leave them out for the Easter Bunny to hide. The kids then go around and find them on Easter morning. We will simply reuse those eggs for the party Easter Egg hunt. Each egg will represent a different treat for which they can swap, or keep the pretty eggs.
-Craft: lots of paint, ribbon glue and glitter for the kids to decorate Easter eggs, bunnies or foam eggs.

I am thinking of making an Easter egg pinata, but I might keep the pinata idea up my sleeve for their birthdays. There will be plenty for them to do as it is.

**Food**
This will be an assortment of dairy-free, nut-free, egg-free hot cross buns, home-made bunny biscuits and pastries, lots of fluffy pink and white marshmallows, Easter egg-shaped fairy bread, fruit, vege sticks, home-made dairy-free easter chocolates and small sandwiches. Lots of water and Easter Punch to drink.

This is what I plan for our Easter party this year. If you are having a gathering of your own, I hope it is a fun and safe time for you all.

If I could see into the future, how many children would I have? My husband has always dreamed of a large family of 6 children. I had always felt that our family would be complete with three littlies. So in the good name of “compromise” my husband also agreed that three would be a great number! That was of course until we discovered this thing called anaphylaxis.

When Declan started kindy last year, I was adamant that we had finished our breeding cycle. I was very reluctant to let him go, and was overwhelmed with anxiety. And this was only kindy, with 20 children in a very well supervised, and controlled environment. School is a very different story. I couldn’t foresee my stress levels subsiding so we decided that two wonderful children would complete our family.

I am not sure what has happened, but my maternal yearnings have started all over again. I have found myself looking at calendars trying to figure out the most suitable month to increase our family. I catch myself day dreaming about holding another new born, the little fingers and toes. The first kick felt, and that wonderful first smile.

I then start the “what if” game. What if Declan and Bianca have a reaction at school, and I am at an antenatal checkup? What if the new baby has countless more allergies than what we are used to now? What if the kids get anxious because they might perceive that I won’t be as “free” to help them if they are having a reaction? What if the baby has no allergies at all?

I have since decided that the “what if” game has infinite questions, and most of them don’t even relate to anaphylaxis.

How do you stop those strong desires to have another child? Should you stop them or even can you stop them?